Show Me Your Tweets

This weekend my girlfriends and I went to the current hot-spot in Scottsdale: the rooftop at the W Hotel. While scanning through the $30,000-millionaires wearing Ed Hardy shirts and True Religion jeans, we ended up running into an SMU alum and found that his friends didn't fall into the typical Scottsdale-guy category. 

After talking to one of the guys for a while and doing the whole small-talk "where did you go to school/where do you live/what do you do" conversation, we moved on to a more important topic: Twitter. 

I won't bore you with our re-tweet questions and @ reply answers, and I will just get straight to the end of the night. That's when the real fun happens, anyways.

Instead of asking for my number or even my BBM pin, TwitterGuy asked for my Twitter name. What the Tweet!?

Although in this case it made sense for him to follow my Tweets rather than get my digits, I called him out on his TwitterCrime. 

"Look at where our generation is - we have found so many forms of 'communication' that we have forgotten how to actually communicate with each other."

TwitterGuy agreed with me as he emailed himself my Twitter name on his CrackBerry.

I didn't even have to wait three days for him to call - I mean, follow me! The next day my CrackBerry was blinking with a TwitterEmail informing me of my newest follower! 

I would classify this TwitterCrime as very low offense because it was somewhat appropriate, but I'm wondering if this is going to become the norm. Pretty soon we are going to start introducing ourselves with an @ before our names. Things are getting so backwards; as if Facebook didn't make things complicated enough. Now I'm going to have to sensor my Tweets, too.

So TwitterGuy gets to see my Tweets without having to take me out. What a lucky Twittstard.

Maybe I should starting Tweeting with protection.

Free Beer Tonight

Now that I have your attention.

Who knew that beer and stalking could go so well together?

Tonight from 6 - 8 pm Slane is offering free draft beer to anyone who broadcasts their location from the bar using meetnowlive.com from their CrackBerries or iPhones.

I had no idea what this Web site was, so I did a little investigating. From first glance the site is a way to tell your friends and possibly random strangers where you are, and you are also able to see "where the party is," according to their homepage. I thought that's what Google Stalker was for.

Seriously, can't we just text our friends to let them know what we're doing? Forget calling, that has been out of style since 1998. Now we are getting so impersonal that we just look up our friends' location by a signal from their phones. No need to ask.

All of these stalking applications are freaking me out. Imagine Google Stalking someone you're dating - how sketchy is that. Once you accept them, you can never lie about what your doing. And when the relationship is over, someone is going to be staring at their phone searching for the location of that person. Just. Plain. Creepy.

Our communication skills are going down the gutter. Between Facebook, Twitter and Google Stalker there is almost no need to personally contact someone. I enjoy these networks as much as the next Joe, but I'm reluctant to make them my main form of communication. I used to think texting was an excuse for guys not to call. Ha! Those were the good old days; now all they have to do is Tweet at you, or worse, find your location on their digital map.

So go get your free beer, broadcast to a network strangers where you are and see what happens. Don't bother calling to tell me - just update your Twitter status.

Be the Next Fonzworth Bentley

I was just checking mediabistro.com to see what new jobs have popped up today, and the first posting just happened to read: "PERSONAL ASSISTANT TO CELEBRITY HIP HOP MEDIA MOGUL."

OMG. It's Sean Combs. I mean Puff Daddy. I mean P. Diddy. I mean Diddy.

Could I go this low and apply to carry around an umbrella to shade Diddy? Am I that desperate?

Let me decide as I read this job description:

"The unemployment rate may be at an all-time high, but at least one person is hiring...DIDDY. VH1 and Sean P. Diddy Combs are now accepting resumes for potential candidates to compete for the position of P. Diddy's Personal Assistant on the reality TV show, "I WANT TO WORK FOR DIDDY 2."Diddy will once again hold a nationwide search for an Assistant with the mental and physical stamina it takes to work for one of the world's most high profile CEOs. A batch of new hopefuls will once again be put through the rigors of what it takes to win one of the toughest, but most rewarding jobs in "the business." Whether you call him P.Diddy, Puffy or Sean Combs...Now is your chance to call this legend of hip-hop "Boss." If you think you have what it takes to be P. Diddy's Assistant, then we want to hear from you.Qualification/Requirements- Applicants must be 21 or older by June 2009. - Must have a "WHATEVER IT TAKES" attitude. - You'll need a big personality to stand out amongst the other candidates. - Must be available and on-call 24/7 & able to cater to the BAD BOY Chairman of the Board, P.Diddy. -Characters welcome. To apply go to http://workforpdiddy.com."

Do I apply? Do I have what it takes? Can I cater to the "Bad Boy Chairman of the Board?"

I bet he just needs someone to do his 1 million daily Twitter updates. Didn't you hear Diddy, Ashton Kutcher is the "King of Twitter."

Sorry Diddy, I stopped following you on Twitter because you tweeted too many times.